...what happens to Baby B's body after she passes?
I know that at least a few of you had the passing thought. It was a question I asked my doctor.
The answer: Nothing.
I will carry a dead baby, along with living Baby A, throughout my pregnancy.
It's a terrible thought. I will be pregnant with twins even though one of them is not living.
The high risk OB described it as a pressed flower. Once her heart stops beating, the body, amniotic sac and placenta will no longer have blood flow and they will slowly start to "dry up." As Baby A grows (God willing,) he (oh yeah, I think Baby A is a boy now) will press against her and she will eventually disintegrate.
It's really hard for me to wrap my head around. The OB said that, at delivery, it will be hard to tell that there was another baby in there. That creeps me out and makes me so sad. She has left such a lasting impression in my life, it makes me sad to think that it'll be hard to see that she ever existed.
Beyond that, it concerns me that some of her sac could remain in my body after I have Baby A and cause me physical grief. I'll be discussing this with my regular OB at my next appointment (April 23.)
I'm also having a hard time understanding what is happening. Am I miscarrying? Technically, I will not physically be losing a baby. She won't even be stillborn because she will have "disintegrated" by birth.
It's just so eery. And sad. For the remainder of this pregnancy, I will be pregnant with twins but only expecting to have one baby. It almost makes me want to hide. I don't want unknowing people to ask about my pregnancy because it'll all just feel so fake.
Don't get me wrong, I am thoroughly overjoyed to be able to continue this pregnancy with one healthy baby but this isn't just a traditional singleton pregnancy and I feel like I can't pretend that's the case.
Also, our next ultrasound is Tuesday, April 3rd (the besty's birthday!) I'm sad to say that a successful appointment would show NO heartbeat. If there is still a heartbeat, the doctors will begin pushing for termination.