So if you’re not all caught up on the SIL drama, read here and here. That’s the basics.
This week, MIL emailed me asking me details about my shower. I guess I’m naïve because I really just thought she was asking out of curiosity. Turns out, all the talk about SIL’s shower, was just talk. Nothing has been planned! MIL was asking me questions about my shower because she wants to steal it!!! No joke. She wants to know pricing and my contact so they can get a quote as well. HELL NO!!!
This is total déjà vu. We did this once before when SIL got married a year and a half ago. She booked the same exact room in the same restaurant we had our wedding, I already mentioned how she got my engagement ring (I mean, seriously, how many pear shaped diamonds have you seen?) she chose my colors, she’s used the same favors as we had (we had See’s Candies boxes of chocolates because I love chocolate and anyone that knows me, knows this! She, on the other hand, is allergic to chocolate!!!,) she also booked the same DJ company we had and requested the exact same emcee we had, and then she booked the same photographer we had (who wasn’t even that good!) I almost had a heart attack when her phone rang and her normal, everyday ringtone was OUR first dance song!!! OUR song!!! Seriously…WTF?!?! In the end, many of those plans fell through because of budget issues but the reality is, she TRIED to steal our wedding.
And now…she’s trying to steal my baby shower! I know that I’m a bitter, angry infertile and I am jealous that she barely tried to get pregnant and succeeded. I am fully aware of this…BUT…this isn’t okay, EVER! I feel like I have a baby sister and everything I want to do, she wants to copy. This is ridiculous! But please don’t tell me that “imitation is the highest form of flattery.” I DON’T want to hear it…and I think its baloney anyway. =)
So, I gave the bare minimum info to my MIL. I exaggerated the prices because I’m pretty sure its way out of their price range anyhow and I didn’t give her the contact. What I did do is, give her ALL of the other info I got from the many other venues I researched. I attached internet addresses and the quotes I got. I’ll just gently steer her in a direction FAR from my shower. We’ll see how this goes.
In my last post, I mentioned the confusion with SIL’s due date and how far along she claims she is. Well I just couldn’t take it so I texted her about it. She claims she’ll be 19 weeks Friday which is 3.5 weeks ahead of me even though her due date is only 12 days (not even a full two weeks) before mine. I told her that 19 weeks Friday makes her due date 2/18 NOT 3/2 (yes, I did the math, it was making me crazy!) I told her that something is off. She said “I just go by what the doctor tells me. The due date is just an estimate anyway.” Umm, your doctor is telling you that you’re 19 weeks along AND you’re due 3/2?!?! He’s as crazy as she is! I told her she might want to reconsider having her shower on 2/5 since she’s really due 2/18. Bottom line: She or her doctor (or both) are on crack! 19 weeks does not equal an EDD of 3/2/11. There’s no way around that. I feel better for having mentioned it even though nothing about the conversation gave me closure. At least she knows she can’t bullsh!t me! I’m onto her!!! Muahahaha!
That’s the update on the SIL debacle. I’m sure this won’t be the last post…unfortunately.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Monday, September 20, 2010
Spilling the beans to the ILs
I made MIL a cute frame with an u/s pic in it. Now that we know we’re having a boy, we know we’re decorating his nursery in a firefighter theme (the hubs is a part-time firefighter and hoping to be full-time very soon!) I made a red matte for the pic decorated with fire trucks and wrote “Baby Boy B(our last name)” and “Coming Soon 3/14/2011.” It’s cute that our last name starts with a ‘B.’ We had also got customized M&Ms that said “It’s a BOY!!!” and our due date “March 14 2011.” We brought the gifts over to their house yesterday afternoon.
We did the regular chatting for a bit and then the hubs gave his mom the frame. She opened it up and nearly shouted, “It’s another baby!!!” She jumped up and hugged both of us. I was watching FIL’s face and it took him a minute to realize what was happening but even he hugged us. He told me he was proud of us. LOL! An odd thing to say but I figured I’m pretty proud of us for getting pregnant too! It was all very sweet and I was very happy for their human reaction. There wasn’t even a comment made about why we waited so long to tell them.
MIL asked the hubs if he had told his sister yet and we said that we’d call her later. MIL insisted that we tell her then. She called SIL and told her to come over when they got out of church. We went to lunch with the IL’s while we waited.
By the time we got home from lunch, SIL and BIL were at the IL’s house. Let me just start by describing how SIL was sitting on the couch. OMG… She was sitting at an angle leaning on her left arm, her legs slightly spread, back arched, sticking her belly out ridiculously far with her right hand on her tummy. Honestly, you’d think she was 30+ weeks pregnant the way she was sitting. (And for the record, I showed the IL’s my tummy and my MIL commented that my belly was already bigger than SIL’s.) So you see what I mean about SIL being all drama! She’s can’t just sit normal. She has to be all kinds of dramatic about it.
Anyway, the hubs got MIL’s picture frame and handed it to his sister. She stared at it and said, (and I quote) “Oh. Hmm. Okay” and handed it back to the hubs. I was thinking that maybe she was confused, like we had made his mom a frame to put her u/s pic in, by the way she was reacting…or NOT reacting. Then the hubs said, “Yeah, so Deanna’s due right after you.” SIL said, “Cool.” That was it. Nothing more. I still wasn’t convinced she knew what we were telling her. It was the most awkward thing ever. She wouldn’t even look at me. I was so prepared for my IL’s to not react that I didn’t have my guard up so SIL’s non-reaction was shocking. I was speechless. The hubs was wonderful and filled the awkward silence asking her how she’s doing and all the appropriate questions. She still didn’t look at me let alone ask any questions about me. Nothing.
At one point my MIL told SIL that I had an idea for her baby shower invitations. SIL lit up! She fully waddled (while holding her barely existing belly) into the kitchen to look at my idea and then, only then, did she talk to me and acknowledge that I was even there! Suddenly, when the conversation was all about her, her shower and her pregnancy, then she would talk to me.
While in the kitchen MIL and SIL had a quick conversation that went like this…
MIL: Jim and Deanna have been trying to get pregnant for 2 years.
SIL: Oh, they say that you need to be off birth control for 6 months to a year before you can expect to get pregnant…but it only took me one month.
WTF?!?! If I had my ‘go, go gadget arms’ I would’ve smacked the sh!t out of her! Such a b!tch! When is her response ever appropriate for the comment my MIL made. Seriously!!!
Something else weird that happened…SIL mentioned that she’s already 18 weeks yesterday and she’ll be 20 weeks at her anatomy scan next Thursday. Now, I’m doing the math and since she’s due 12 days before me, she should be 12 days ahead of me. So, I’m 15 weeks today, she should be 16w5d which means she’ll be 17 weeks on Wednesday, right?!?! So that means she’ll be 18w1d next Thursday at her scan. Am I crazy? Am I doing the math wrong? I mean, seriously, I don’t get it. Is she lying about her due date or is she lying about how far along she is? Weird, right? I can’t quite figure it out. The hubs asked me what she would have to benefit from lying about either of those things and I can’t come up with anything but it doesn’t change the fact that her dates are totally off.
And get this, SIL has already registered for everything. (Am I behind in registering???) The baby’s room, regardless of gender, is going to be brown! MIL originally told me that she had picked out blue and brown bedding which I guess could be gender neutral but I looked at the registry last night and it’s completely brown. There might be the slightest bit of blue stitching but overall, it’s brown. I didn’t even know they made completely brown nursery sets.
So…that’s the story of telling the IL’s. I survived and I’m glad the cat’s out of the bag and we can move on. I’m thrilled that I was wrong about the IL’s reaction but I WAS NOT wrong about SIL. She is a dramatic b!tch and us being pregnant at the same time will not be bringing us closer together.
We did the regular chatting for a bit and then the hubs gave his mom the frame. She opened it up and nearly shouted, “It’s another baby!!!” She jumped up and hugged both of us. I was watching FIL’s face and it took him a minute to realize what was happening but even he hugged us. He told me he was proud of us. LOL! An odd thing to say but I figured I’m pretty proud of us for getting pregnant too! It was all very sweet and I was very happy for their human reaction. There wasn’t even a comment made about why we waited so long to tell them.
MIL asked the hubs if he had told his sister yet and we said that we’d call her later. MIL insisted that we tell her then. She called SIL and told her to come over when they got out of church. We went to lunch with the IL’s while we waited.
By the time we got home from lunch, SIL and BIL were at the IL’s house. Let me just start by describing how SIL was sitting on the couch. OMG… She was sitting at an angle leaning on her left arm, her legs slightly spread, back arched, sticking her belly out ridiculously far with her right hand on her tummy. Honestly, you’d think she was 30+ weeks pregnant the way she was sitting. (And for the record, I showed the IL’s my tummy and my MIL commented that my belly was already bigger than SIL’s.) So you see what I mean about SIL being all drama! She’s can’t just sit normal. She has to be all kinds of dramatic about it.
Anyway, the hubs got MIL’s picture frame and handed it to his sister. She stared at it and said, (and I quote) “Oh. Hmm. Okay” and handed it back to the hubs. I was thinking that maybe she was confused, like we had made his mom a frame to put her u/s pic in, by the way she was reacting…or NOT reacting. Then the hubs said, “Yeah, so Deanna’s due right after you.” SIL said, “Cool.” That was it. Nothing more. I still wasn’t convinced she knew what we were telling her. It was the most awkward thing ever. She wouldn’t even look at me. I was so prepared for my IL’s to not react that I didn’t have my guard up so SIL’s non-reaction was shocking. I was speechless. The hubs was wonderful and filled the awkward silence asking her how she’s doing and all the appropriate questions. She still didn’t look at me let alone ask any questions about me. Nothing.
At one point my MIL told SIL that I had an idea for her baby shower invitations. SIL lit up! She fully waddled (while holding her barely existing belly) into the kitchen to look at my idea and then, only then, did she talk to me and acknowledge that I was even there! Suddenly, when the conversation was all about her, her shower and her pregnancy, then she would talk to me.
While in the kitchen MIL and SIL had a quick conversation that went like this…
MIL: Jim and Deanna have been trying to get pregnant for 2 years.
SIL: Oh, they say that you need to be off birth control for 6 months to a year before you can expect to get pregnant…but it only took me one month.
WTF?!?! If I had my ‘go, go gadget arms’ I would’ve smacked the sh!t out of her! Such a b!tch! When is her response ever appropriate for the comment my MIL made. Seriously!!!
Something else weird that happened…SIL mentioned that she’s already 18 weeks yesterday and she’ll be 20 weeks at her anatomy scan next Thursday. Now, I’m doing the math and since she’s due 12 days before me, she should be 12 days ahead of me. So, I’m 15 weeks today, she should be 16w5d which means she’ll be 17 weeks on Wednesday, right?!?! So that means she’ll be 18w1d next Thursday at her scan. Am I crazy? Am I doing the math wrong? I mean, seriously, I don’t get it. Is she lying about her due date or is she lying about how far along she is? Weird, right? I can’t quite figure it out. The hubs asked me what she would have to benefit from lying about either of those things and I can’t come up with anything but it doesn’t change the fact that her dates are totally off.
And get this, SIL has already registered for everything. (Am I behind in registering???) The baby’s room, regardless of gender, is going to be brown! MIL originally told me that she had picked out blue and brown bedding which I guess could be gender neutral but I looked at the registry last night and it’s completely brown. There might be the slightest bit of blue stitching but overall, it’s brown. I didn’t even know they made completely brown nursery sets.
So…that’s the story of telling the IL’s. I survived and I’m glad the cat’s out of the bag and we can move on. I’m thrilled that I was wrong about the IL’s reaction but I WAS NOT wrong about SIL. She is a dramatic b!tch and us being pregnant at the same time will not be bringing us closer together.
Quick Post
I just wanted to quickly post that we had our early gender determination ultrasound. And… it’s a perfectly, healthy, adorably baby BOY!!! We are beyond excited!!! Not only am I overwhelming blessed to be pregnant at all but we are having the baby boy just like we had hoped. I’m not sure that it gets any better!
I’ll post a little bit later also because we finally told my IL’s about the baby and we told my SIL as well. The IL’s went surprisingly well, but the SIL…that’s another story. She’s such a bitch!!!
Anyway, let’s end on a good note…
I’ll post a little bit later also because we finally told my IL’s about the baby and we told my SIL as well. The IL’s went surprisingly well, but the SIL…that’s another story. She’s such a bitch!!!
Anyway, let’s end on a good note…
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Baby Related Post!
I've been a terrible blogger. I know. If you didn't catch it, this is going to be a baby related post. I'm just warning you in case you're feeling extra sensitive or reading about someone else's pregnancy is hard for you. I completely understand!
I'll be 15 weeks pregnant Monday. We regularly listen to baby's heartbeat on my doppler and I get teary eyed every time. I'm starting to get the slightest little belly and I LOVE IT!!! I do my very best to draw attention to it. My mom took me on an awesome maternity clothes shopping spree last week. I got a formal-ish dress to wear to a wedding in November and also on our cruise that same month, I got a super cute long dress that makes my tiny belly look much larger, I got a few tops, a pair of shorts and two pairs of jeans. I also had to make the jump to a bigger bra. Fitting into my normal size bras was becoming more and more complicated. I still wasn't ready to graduate into a maternity/nursing bra so I just went up a size in a normal bra. It's already getting a little snug so I know it'll be short lived. I just hate bra shopping.
We picked a venue and a date for my baby shower! My mom and my bff are throwing it. I started working on the guest list a few weeks back and it grew to over 80 people in a matter of minutes. We realized then that we needed to get onto planning because finding a venue to hold that many people could be difficult. It was! We finally went with a local golf club (pic below.) The room is amazing and overlooks the golf course. The shower will be January 15th, about 2 full months before my due date. I'd rather have it earlier than later. I want to be able to get all the shower gifts washed and in their new home long before baby makes his/her entrance.
Speaking of, we're having our early gender determination ultrasound Saturday!!! We have both been fairly confident that we're having a boy, until last night... The hubs had a dream that we had a girl! Apparently, this rocked his world and now he's a nervous wreck which makes me nervous. We will definitely welcome a girl with open arms but we've both always wanted a boy first. Now, we have to wait three more looooong days to hopefully find out.
We went and chatted with the IL's last weekend. They just got back from a two week cruise to Europe and we wanted to get all the cruise talk out of the way before we even consider telling them about our baby. My MIL couldn't stop talking about SIL's pregnancy. She is very excited and I just pray that she is equally excited for us to be having a baby too. We decided to tell them once we know what we're having. If SIL can trump us by telling them first and being due before me, we'll trump her by finding out the gender first and telling them! Muahahaha!!!
OMG!!! Get this...Our besties just had their second baby (I mentioned her in my quick update last post) and named him Colton James. James after my husband and Colton because it was between Connor and Colton and Colton won more votes. Well, MIL was telling me that SIL has decided on names (even though her DH isn't on board with them yet) AND...her boy name is Colton James!!! What are the effing chances?!?! I'm 90% sure she doesn't know that our besties named their son that but it annoys me nonetheless. I guess the chances of her naming her son the same name as our friends' son is the same chances as her being pregnant at the same time as me! Ugh!!! I'm counting on her having a girl!
Anyway, that's the baby happenings for now. I've been keeping up on all your blogs but I haven't been commenting much. Don't hate me!
I'll be 15 weeks pregnant Monday. We regularly listen to baby's heartbeat on my doppler and I get teary eyed every time. I'm starting to get the slightest little belly and I LOVE IT!!! I do my very best to draw attention to it. My mom took me on an awesome maternity clothes shopping spree last week. I got a formal-ish dress to wear to a wedding in November and also on our cruise that same month, I got a super cute long dress that makes my tiny belly look much larger, I got a few tops, a pair of shorts and two pairs of jeans. I also had to make the jump to a bigger bra. Fitting into my normal size bras was becoming more and more complicated. I still wasn't ready to graduate into a maternity/nursing bra so I just went up a size in a normal bra. It's already getting a little snug so I know it'll be short lived. I just hate bra shopping.
We picked a venue and a date for my baby shower! My mom and my bff are throwing it. I started working on the guest list a few weeks back and it grew to over 80 people in a matter of minutes. We realized then that we needed to get onto planning because finding a venue to hold that many people could be difficult. It was! We finally went with a local golf club (pic below.) The room is amazing and overlooks the golf course. The shower will be January 15th, about 2 full months before my due date. I'd rather have it earlier than later. I want to be able to get all the shower gifts washed and in their new home long before baby makes his/her entrance.
Speaking of, we're having our early gender determination ultrasound Saturday!!! We have both been fairly confident that we're having a boy, until last night... The hubs had a dream that we had a girl! Apparently, this rocked his world and now he's a nervous wreck which makes me nervous. We will definitely welcome a girl with open arms but we've both always wanted a boy first. Now, we have to wait three more looooong days to hopefully find out.
We went and chatted with the IL's last weekend. They just got back from a two week cruise to Europe and we wanted to get all the cruise talk out of the way before we even consider telling them about our baby. My MIL couldn't stop talking about SIL's pregnancy. She is very excited and I just pray that she is equally excited for us to be having a baby too. We decided to tell them once we know what we're having. If SIL can trump us by telling them first and being due before me, we'll trump her by finding out the gender first and telling them! Muahahaha!!!
OMG!!! Get this...Our besties just had their second baby (I mentioned her in my quick update last post) and named him Colton James. James after my husband and Colton because it was between Connor and Colton and Colton won more votes. Well, MIL was telling me that SIL has decided on names (even though her DH isn't on board with them yet) AND...her boy name is Colton James!!! What are the effing chances?!?! I'm 90% sure she doesn't know that our besties named their son that but it annoys me nonetheless. I guess the chances of her naming her son the same name as our friends' son is the same chances as her being pregnant at the same time as me! Ugh!!! I'm counting on her having a girl!
Anyway, that's the baby happenings for now. I've been keeping up on all your blogs but I haven't been commenting much. Don't hate me!
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Update!!!
* We had our NT ultrasound yesterday. 1 in 1,500 chance for Down’s Syndrome and 1 in 100,000 chance for Trisomy 18. All good!!!
* It took almost an hour to get all the appropriate measurements for the above results. An hour long u/s isn’t as fun as you’d imagine. All the pushing actually left me sore. I did enjoy seeing the baby though!
*My BFF (besty) had a perfect baby boy on the 19th. She’s the accidentally pregnant one I talked about here.
* I got to spend almost two weeks with the besty and her growing family. She also has a 13-month old. Her hands are very full and I enjoyed every minute of being an auntie!
* The new baby melts my heart! I can’t wait to have my own new baby that I don’t have to give back.
* I’m still not over the whole SIL pregnancy drama. But thank you all soooo much for the comments. I knew you guys would get it. So many of your have dealt with the same crap and said some of the exact things I’ve said/thought. I love you all for making me feel less crazy.
* The hubs and I still haven’t told my ILs about our baby. We argue about it almost every other day. I’m getting to the point that I just want to get it over with so we can stop discussing it. I think we’ve agreed to wait until we know the gender and we will hopefully be finding that out in the next two weeks. (We will be scheduling a private u/s. I’m no good at being patient.)
* I had the nastiest cold over the last two weeks (I thought it was just allergies initially.) I don’t really know if it was that bad or just that bad because I couldn’t take my usual drugs. It was no fun!
* Unfortunately, whatever I had was passed onto the besty’s hubby and then to her immune compromised 13-month old. I cried at the thought of passing my germs on. Turns out, her hubby has something much worse than I had and she doesn’t think it came from me. Regardless, I had to keep all the snuggling and kissing to a minimum.
* I haven’t been blogging much because I don’t know how to blog anymore. I don’t want to complain about my pregnancy (not that there’s really too much to complain about) and I don’t want to embrace the pregnancy (although it is becoming more of a reality) and have something terrible happen. I’m working through it and I know many of you have been through this also. Hang in there with me. I’m still reading your posts and even commenting here and there.
* Speaking of, I cleared the first trimester while I was MIA. I’m 12w3d today. And guess what? The nausea hasn’t gone away. Suck!
* Baby was measuring 13w3d (a week and a day ahead of schedule) at the u/s yesterday. I love big babies! (Remind me I said that when I’m in labor!)
* I decided to “come out” at work today. Of course, I haven’t actually told anyone yet. I put this picture frame on my desk and I figured I’d just wait for someone to see it and comment. I kind of feel weird about blurting it out. Maybe because I know how much it sucked when others did it while I was TTC.
* Is anyone else shocked that we’re in September?!?! What the heck happened to August?
*** IMPORTANT: I have meds to donate. Please email me at missedconception(at)yahoo(dot)com if you use Bravelle, Menopur, PIO, or the HCG trigger shot. I only have one trigger available but quite a bit of the rest.
* It took almost an hour to get all the appropriate measurements for the above results. An hour long u/s isn’t as fun as you’d imagine. All the pushing actually left me sore. I did enjoy seeing the baby though!
*My BFF (besty) had a perfect baby boy on the 19th. She’s the accidentally pregnant one I talked about here.
* I got to spend almost two weeks with the besty and her growing family. She also has a 13-month old. Her hands are very full and I enjoyed every minute of being an auntie!
* The new baby melts my heart! I can’t wait to have my own new baby that I don’t have to give back.
* I’m still not over the whole SIL pregnancy drama. But thank you all soooo much for the comments. I knew you guys would get it. So many of your have dealt with the same crap and said some of the exact things I’ve said/thought. I love you all for making me feel less crazy.
* The hubs and I still haven’t told my ILs about our baby. We argue about it almost every other day. I’m getting to the point that I just want to get it over with so we can stop discussing it. I think we’ve agreed to wait until we know the gender and we will hopefully be finding that out in the next two weeks. (We will be scheduling a private u/s. I’m no good at being patient.)
* I had the nastiest cold over the last two weeks (I thought it was just allergies initially.) I don’t really know if it was that bad or just that bad because I couldn’t take my usual drugs. It was no fun!
* Unfortunately, whatever I had was passed onto the besty’s hubby and then to her immune compromised 13-month old. I cried at the thought of passing my germs on. Turns out, her hubby has something much worse than I had and she doesn’t think it came from me. Regardless, I had to keep all the snuggling and kissing to a minimum.
* I haven’t been blogging much because I don’t know how to blog anymore. I don’t want to complain about my pregnancy (not that there’s really too much to complain about) and I don’t want to embrace the pregnancy (although it is becoming more of a reality) and have something terrible happen. I’m working through it and I know many of you have been through this also. Hang in there with me. I’m still reading your posts and even commenting here and there.
* Speaking of, I cleared the first trimester while I was MIA. I’m 12w3d today. And guess what? The nausea hasn’t gone away. Suck!
* Baby was measuring 13w3d (a week and a day ahead of schedule) at the u/s yesterday. I love big babies! (Remind me I said that when I’m in labor!)
* Is anyone else shocked that we’re in September?!?! What the heck happened to August?
*** IMPORTANT: I have meds to donate. Please email me at missedconception(at)yahoo(dot)com if you use Bravelle, Menopur, PIO, or the HCG trigger shot. I only have one trigger available but quite a bit of the rest.
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