Here we go...

Out of no where AF decided to show up…early!!!

Generally, AF sends Spot two days before her arrival. I was a little surprised to see Spot yesterday (cd25) since I’ve never seen AF before cd28.

I was even more shocked this morning to see AF in all her glory! Sometimes I second guess her arrival but I’m pretty certain this is really her. (But of course, now that I’m thinking about it, this could be Spot and that would be AF right on schedule for her arrival on cd28. Hmm… I’ll just assume it’s her for now and keep you posted. Cause I know you’re dying to know, LOL!)

For once, I’m so excited to see her!!! This means that I can start the IVF planning.

I called my RE’s office this morning. We have our first appointment on Monday, May 3^rd. This will be my baseline appointment and I believe I’ll be starting Lup.ron that day.

The rest of the plans are a little foggy right now (we’ll solidify them on the 3^rd) but I know that I’ll be on Lup.ron for two weeks. I’ll see AF again during that time but regardless of her visit, I’ll start stims on May 17^th. I think she said I’d be on Meno.pur and Brav.elle.

I’m so happy to have some appointments on my calendar again!

An anniversary baby?!?!

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve never been so wishy washy / impulsive / indecisive in my life!

If you’re not on Twit.ter, I mentioned to my tweeps that an IVF in May (not July/August or October/November like the past two IVF conversations the hubs and I have had) would give me and EDD right near our 6^th wedding anniversary!!! Since we started TTC, an anniversary baby has always been a little dream of mine. It’s nothing I’ve vocalized but something I’ve definitely thought about and hoped would work out.

So…this morning I was reading Andrea’s post (yes, Andrea, I’m blaming you… just kidding!) She was talking about EDD’s and a 2010/2011 baby. It got me thinking, if this month was the last chance for a 2010 baby, then next month is the first chance for a 2011 baby…the month of our anniversary!!!

Frantic (because did I mention that I’ve been caffeine free for almost two years and today I just “needed” a full caff latte…I’m nearly bouncing off the walls) text to the hubs at 9:10am: We need to do IVF NOW!!! We can have an anniversary baby if we get on it sooooon!!!

Second frantic text to the hubs at 9:11am  (he didn’t write me back soon enough): OMG! Seriously, let’s do it!

Third frantic text to the hubs at 9:27am: Are you in the shower or just ignoring me???

Finally, a response at 9:34am: I’m undecided

(What?!? That’s it, not even a punctuation mark?)

Me:  But considering it???????

Him: I think you’re too concerned about dates and not money. Let’s run the numbers.

(Oh okay, Mr. Voice of Reason…you’re no fun!)

Me: Call me

When he called we quickly ran the numbers. TOTALLY FEASIBLE!!! No, like seriously!!!  We can do this!!! (Sorry, that’s a lot of exclamation points.) He tells me that we need to think this through a little more (Who is this guy?!?) and run the numbers more. At this point, I told him that Holly (@ready2Bmom) and Jess (@AzoosBeyotch) both told us to “go for it!” (Funny thing is, he actually knew who I was talking about. Feel like I actually know you girls! LOL)

What do I do?

Immediately print out a calendar. Write in the dates we get certain deposits ($$$). Write in my possible CD1 so that I can calculate when I’d start Lupron and then stims. Leave a message for the nurse at the RE’s office so I can verify the meds protocol and then update the calendar. Wait for the stinkin’ nurse at the RE’s office to get back from lunch to answer my questions.

I’m going to have a full presentation for the hubs when I get home from work!

Also…I want to thank you for commenting on my FIL’s lame a$$ comment about the epidural. I love that you guys are all on the same page as me. I have no problem with epidurals or otherwise. The problem is him giving me his ignorant opinion on something that really doesn’t concern him. I was telling Amanda, he gets kidney stones frequently. I asked him in that conversation if he’d endure passing one of those tiny little stones out of his junk without his meds! Nope…didn’t think so!!! Jerk!

Patience is a virtue...

Grandma got nervous about her money (I suspected this might happen) and she changed her offer from $10,000 to $6,000, which is still WAY more than I could’ve ever imagined! She did say that she’ll give us more money if she has more when the time comes but we’re guaranteed the $6,000. I definitely can’t complain about that.

And…the hubs sold his motorcycle last night!!! This is such a long story but the short version is that I was never really on board for the motorcycle in the first place. I literally bawled when he got it. After over a year of ownership, he’d only put 500 miles on it. I think he finally realized it was just a waste. For the record, I never told him to sell it but I definitely did encourage it. A few months ago he told me that he thought we could use that money more than he can use the bike so…he decided to sell. He’d only been actively trying for a few weeks but last night we got an offer for $200 more than the lowest we would take! I’m ecstatic! The baby fund is already growing.

Originally we were thinking July/August for IVF now we’re throwing around October/November. Listen to how ridiculous my reasoning is…

My ILs really annoy me. They truly are good people and I DO love them but man, oh man, do they get on my last nerve.

[For example, last Christmas, the discussion of child labor came up. My MIL used to be a Brad.ley Meth.od instructor. My FIL asked if I thought I’d use an epidural when I had a baby. I said that I wasn’t sure. He proceeded to tell me, ‘No grandchild of mine will be born with an epidural!’ I think there was steam coming out of my ears. Who the heck is he to decide how I will have a child. I told him when he gets a vag.ina and squeezes a child out of it, he can do it however he chooses but my vag.ina = my decision! Jerk!!!]

So onto the possibly postponed IVF…my SIL’s birthday is in April, FIL’s birthday is in May and my MIL’s birthday is in June. None of these months are safe! I feel completely ridiculous that I even care. (And I’ve prayed that God would take away the negative feelings I have about this.) After telling the hubs my thoughts about a baby born April-June I really did see how outrageous it was and I took it all back. I can’t believe I’m even admitting to having such absurd feelings about my ILs. I really do want a child…in any month. I’m not as immature as I sound, promise!

Anyway, the hubs decided that waiting until Oct/Nov might actually be smart because my grandma will have more money to give us by then and it could be a big money saver.

So…now we’re thinking much later this year might be the smarter choice (even without my stupid IL reasoning.) Sadly, this means that I have to dig deep and find some patience to get me to the end of the year. At least five months of waiting…ugh! I guess I’ll just have to wait and see what happens.

Oh…and stop by and send some hugs to Clare. She just found out that she is going to miscarry. Her 8-week old baby no longer has a heartbeat.

My Easter Present

As I mentioned on Twit.ter last week, the hubs sprung it on me that he doesn’t want to wait until 2011 for IVF (like we had discussed,) he wants to get this show on the road. His actual words were, “I don’t think I can wait that long.” It was really pretty cute! It was one of the first times I realized he really has the urgency to be a parent also.

(The hubs also decided he’d love to have a May/June baby. I had no clue he even had an opinion about this. He said it was because he doesn’t want me to have to endure pregnancy during summer. It was so cute considering this isn’t even a concern of mine. I’ll take a baby ANY time of year! )

So, we were mulling it over all weekend. We finally sat down and ran some numbers. Although it’s not an ideal plan (but when are fertility treatments ever the ‘ideal’ plan,) we’ll be able to make it work!!!

After we got home from the IL’s for Easter dinner (which I actually survived without any wine, yea me!) I was talking to my grandma. One of my I-don’t-have-a-job-I-live-off-the-government cousins (from my other side of the family, not this grandma’s side) is having his THIRD baby (second baby mama.) My grandma was just appalled! “Why are they having more children when they can’t support the ones they have?!” I told her that I have the same questions. We started talking to her about our next steps with treatments. I told her about the IVF plan and that we can make it work this year but it’ll be tight. Out of no where, she said that she wasn’t sure if she could give us the full $13k but she thinks she can give us $10,000!!!!!!!!!!!!! $10,000???

My grandma has money but I know that she is always concerned that she’ll run out. I had hoped she’d offer $1k or $2k and I would’ve been eternally grateful for that. Even when I fantasized about more, I imagined she’d offer to pay 50%. Never, did I EVER, think she’d offer nearly ALL of the money!!! NEVER!!!

I immediately got chills, tears welled up in my eyes, I couldn’t get any words out. I was just…floored!!! The hubs told her that she shouldn’t feel obligated. The fact that she even offered ANY money was so appreciated! She said she was just happy to help. I’m still in shock! My grandma doesn’t handle any of her finances so she said she still needs to check with my dad to make sure she can do it but I know enough about her finances to know, she can.

Prior to this weekend’s developments, I was getting to the point of calm (I don’t think  calm is really the right word, let’s just say I was dealing with it okay.) I was coming to terms with no more IUI’s or even RE appointments and I started using my fertility monitor again to see when I’m ovulating this month (CD18=nada, FYI.) Now that we’re actually talking about IVF this year, I’m over the top!!! I’m trying not to count my eggs just yet (pun intended!) but I am elated!

It really does look like we'll be able to do IVF this year!!!

IVF Consult Post

Here’s the post I owe you… =)

I survived the final IUI BFN. I drown (drowned?) my sorrows in WAY too many beers on St Patty's day (wow, was that seriously two weeks ago?!?) I'm actually ashamed at how much I drank with the sole purpose to forget. Obviously, I still remembered the BFN the next morning and also had a doozy of a hangover to deal with. Not so smart!

We had the big IVF consult last week. Thank you SO much to all you wonderful ladies that responded to my call for IVF questions to ask my RE and advice. I really appreciate the input! This is just a rundown of some thing answers we got. I hope some of it can be helpful to those of you getting ready for your own consult. I know that the comments from the IVF pros I got were SO helpful. That is where most of my questions came from.

What does the doctor recommend for us? This is explained a little more in detail below. I’m not sure of the exact meds that I’d be on (I either forgot to ask or I just forgot what he said.) The plan is to do 50% ICSI if the sample is ideal. This way we can see how the sperm interact with the egg in a “natural” setting. He also recommends PICSI to get the best sperm. If the sample isn’t ideal, we’ll do 100% ICSI. He’ll transfer 2-3 embryos based on quality.

What meds will I be on? Lupron to start. That’s all I can remember. I did ask if I’d have to endure the evil PIO IM shots and he said yes. I’m a trooper though and if it gets me to a BFP, I’ll do it!!!

How long will my IVF cycle be? He said I'd start Lupron on day 21 of my cycle. Then start stims on day 3 (or maybe it was 5.) 8-10 days of stims, then trigger.

How often will I be seen for monitoring? Every 3 days or so, depending on reaction to stims.

Will insurance cover any of the IVF? Meds only (except Lupron) – which is freakin’ awesome!

Is there a shared risk plan available? YES! It’s a significant savings too! (Cost breakdown below.) If we purchase multiple IVFs and I get pregnant on the first we lose the extra money we paid for the other IVF(s). If I miscarry within the first trimester, I can still use the second IVF.

How many embryos will he transfer? His goal is to transfer 2-grade A, 8-cell embryos. If I don't have excellent quality embies, he'd consider transferring 3 lesser quality embies.

What does he expect my response to be? (Just an estimation based on past stim cycles and my age) He hopes to retrieve about 15 eggs from me, about 10 to be mature and hopefully 7 to makes it to transfer/freeze.

What is the chance that I will have OHSS? He said that there is a pretty decent chance that I will have mild OHSS (mild discomfort and bloating,) about a 20% chance of moderate OHSS (moderate discomfort and bloating) and a small chance for severe OHSS that requires medical intervention.

Will we aim for a 3dt or 5dt? I think he said that we'd aim for a 3dt. I'm second guessing my hearing abilities since so many of you mentioned that a 5dt is ideal. Hmm... I’ll definitely clear up the confusion when the time comes.

Would he suggest ICSI for us? We agreed to see what the hubs' sample looks like on the day of ER. Assuming the sample will be as good (or better) as they have been in the past and we get a good number of mature eggs from me, we'll ICSI 50% and let the other half do their thing "naturally" to see how the sperm work with the egg. There could always be a chance that our issues lie in the sperm penetrating the egg. If the hubs' sample isn't ideal and/or they don't retrieve an ideal number of eggs, we'll ICSI all the eggs for the best chances.

Would he suggest assisted hatching for us? Based on my age, no. But if he sees that the shell of my egg(s) is hardened for some reason, he'll use assisted hatching.

Bedrest? He said I won't need bed rest after the ER but I'll need 2 additional days past the ET of bed rest. Does this sound right? I think I've read that a few of you have significant pain after ER.

And finally, cost? Based on my age, the cost for one IVF is $7,000 (which includes all office visits, blood work, embryologist, lab work, ER and ET.) The cost for two IVFs is $8,900 and the cost for three IVFs is $10,900. ICSI is $1,500 in addition. PICSI is $500, operating fees and anesthesia is $1,250, and embryo freezing (assuming we have embies to freeze) is $850 (for freezing and one year of storage.)

We’re planning on doing the two IVF plan for $8,900 and also the rest of the extras. So we’re currently doing our best to save $13,000 ASAP. It seems like SO much money but I know that we can do it. I struggle with wanting to see that money in our savings account so that I can have a baby and stay home (or just stay home longer before returning to work.)

I know this sounds silly but I don’t want to get pregnant naturally before starting IVF. I don’t want to be another on of those “as soon as I stopped trying, I got pregnant” clichés. I know, I know…it’s ridiculous. (You know what I mean though, right?!?!) The reality is, I will be overjoyed with saving $13k, the extra stress, the turmoil on my body, etc…to get BFP naturally. I will…promise!!!

So I’m curious how my RE stacks up against yours with IVF cost and plan of action. If anyone wants to volunteer their cost and protocol, I’d love to hear.